Don't Quit Your Daydream

     We all daydream. We all have dreams. We all wonder with "what ifs" and "maybes". I love daydreaming, but I find myself living in my head many moments through the day. One thought that has been running through my mind lately, although I don't like to think on "what ifs" because it's never reality, is my dad. Just a slight background history on my life: My dad passed in 2005 when I was 9 years of age. 

     I honestly don't mind talking about it. I've had people ask about my dad and when I inform them of the reality they always seem upset and cautious in what they say. I'm never offended anymore or believe that it is a touchy subject, simply because it's a fact that no one can ever change. It's reality; it's my life. I always try to tell others about what little bit I do remember about him and try to lighten the mood a bit. One big thing that I try to do if someone has recently had a parent pass, is help that person out. Whether they are older or younger... advice has no age label.

     My daydreams recently have been involving him. The three major questions I've been asking myself are:

     What would he be like? How would my life be like today? What would I be like? I know I will never get the answers to these questions, and that's alright. I'm totally fine with that. But, yes, I do wonder. 

     What would be his favorite recent movie? Would he like my favorite genre(s) of music? How would he look at me? Would he agree with my life choices and goals? What advice could and would he have given me? Most people say only what one wishes to hear:

     "Oh sweetie, he would be proud of you! He would support every move in your life and stand behind you every step of the way. And he would look at you as his son and would accept whatever you want and who you are." 

     Well, gee thanks! I could have created up those 'answers'. But how do you know? If my mother's and father's life would have been switched, I could say the same about her, but knowing how she truly is, it would all be one huge lie. She wouldn't like most of my music preferences; she wouldn't completely support me, and she would look at me as an outsider. Although, I would hear what I want, it wouldn't make it true. So, I ask again, how do you know? We don't, but like I said, I'm okay with that. 

     My life may be different. Instead of being placed in DSS custody, perhaps I would've lived with him. Maybe I wouldn't even have had the chance to even have that option to go into DSS (I probably wouldn't have skipped school). Would he have been stable enough to even take care of us (my brothers and I)?

     We always attempt to imagine the most possible outcome. Which is only natural. But, look at it from both perceptions. It's not a crime to do so. It may make you feel like a bad person because you think of it that way, but it's not uncommon. The person I am today may not even exist. His impression may reside within me. His advice may have been taken and put into action. I may be a total wreck due to the realization of having no parents who truly act as parents. Or maybe I may be at my prime.      

     Wishing only gets you so far - it only keeps you moving. Dreaming is only an escape. But, realization allows you to mold your character. Never assume the best only to get the worst. See your life through both eyes (great and horrible) and that will really show you where you want to be and where to start to get there. That said, I'm not saying it's going to be easy. We all need help and will continue to make mistakes and achieve small goals, as well as big ones. 

     As long as we remember where we came from, where we are going and who we are, we can stay honest and true to ourselves. Stop every once in awhile and realize life. Your life. What you are thankful for and things within yourself you can and want to change. This is a practice only one can encounter with honesty in their hearts. Only one who truly wants to see, can see. 

     Always carry yourself with self-love and self-respect! 

(P.S. If you don't know who this stunning, talented and gifted woman is. . . please search her name and find out who she is. Her song "Daydream" off her Foreword EP is amazing, and it sort of inspired this post.)

Mockingjay (Part 1) Movie Review

If you're like me and read books before their movie come to theatres, then I believe, one hundred and ten percent, that you can agree with me on this: No movie is ever better than the book! The book is allowed to speak on a more emotional and descriptive level than a movie. 

With that said, there are movies that can conjure the same affect. But, in order for a book to be installed as a movie, they must rewrite and screen-write and so forth and so on (I am no expert in this field, this is just from what I know). Therefore, they have to add in different elements to the scenes to capture that emotion. Whether it's extra words, or someone else describing something or even music, the book's emotional feeling is attempted to be transferred on screen. This can be difficult and confusing. This is what most readers, like myself, nagg the movie industries for. 

The Hunger Games series is an amazing book collection. I can't deny that. The effortless composure of the overall storyline is quite astonishing. The connection you feel with the characters keeps you on edge and you begin to create you own alliance. Some may dislike Katniss Everdeen, because she is so stubborn and always on her "own mission". While others may dislike like President Snow for his overpowered authority. Whatever the case, that's what grabs the emotional connections to you and the book. 

The movie installment on the other hand, it felt very dragged out. The book had much activity going on constantly. Not necessarily action but something that kept you waiting. While I sat in the theatres waiting for the title screen to appear, the first five minutes felt dull and lifeless. It didn't really catch my attention. As the movie proceeded (or prolonged, shall I say), I actually caught myself dozing off. 

That's not suppose to happen! 

While they went by the book as best as possible for the film, it felt like they stretched out the not-so-important parts and converted the emotional content into a lousy portrayal of such, just to make a part one. To me, personally, it wasn't worth seeing. I feel as if they could've just made it all into one movie, instead of keeping the franchise going an additional year. But I'm also giving them the benefit-of-the-doubt and predict that part two of the saga collection will be more exhilarating. Because, like I mentioned, there is action in the book, so I'm expecting action in the last movie. 

I rate it an honest seven out of ten. And that's because I'm expecting the second part to be more promising. I believe if it weren't for the second part, I would rate it a lot lower. The first two movies in the collection were good. Very good indeed. I'm just not convinced about this particular one.

I wouldn't recommend seeing it in theatres. I wouldn't even recommend buying this one. But, if you're like my friend, you will buy it to complete your personal collection. I would rent it and be done. You're getting some information to prepare you for the second part of MOCKINGJAY; but if you decided to not watch it, it's not really like you're missing anything huge. In part one there are about a total or three or four scenes that were great ad the rest were a disappointment. 

"Happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever. In. Your. Favor." ***whistles and raises the tribute salute***

The Tree of Life

A tree. So simple, elegant, and beautiful. They come in many different shapes and sizes and so many astonishing varieties. All born from a tiny seed that's been blessed and nurtured. Always on time for spring and never late for autumn and fall. Yet, they have no sense of time! No clocks; no one to advice them; nothing going off with an alarm. These simple creations are undoubtedly functionally complex that it's perfect. 

They continue to provide oxygen and bare the fruit we consume. The roots that hold the trees intact to the ground we dig, through vicious winds of many natural disasters, grow deeply into the soil in which it was conceived. As autumn and fall approach they slowly and beautifully say goodbye to the leaves they've provided a place to reside. They let go only with the knowledge that they will be blessed, once again, when the time and conditions are right. 

They do not rush; they do not complain. The leaves, happy to touch and feel the ground their parent was born in, show their appreciation by changing colors. Once their color fades, they are composed into nutrients for their parent to produce more leaves. The water from the clouds above and the light from the sun contribute to the growth of fruit and leaves in spring. Trees know that everything will happen in time. 

They do not worry; they do not hurt. Instead, they love endlessly: giving air to the suffering, enjoying every moment with their leaves as possible, so when it's their time to part the tree isn't selfish. The tree simply encourages and lets go proudly as the leaves settle on the ground. Once the tree, itself, is ready to pass over it does so willingly, knowing their purpose has been served. 

An energy pulsates through this organism like no other. Yet, we overlook it everyday. Life and people are much like trees. People come in different shapes sizes and are each uniquely and perfectly different. We are the seeds taking root in the soil. One day, some will produce leaves and others will bare fresh produce. Naturally, these leaves and produce will embark on their own journeys. When this moment comes, do no partake in selfishness. Encourage and guide them. Love often and know your purpose has been served. Continue to give often with the expectations of receiving nothing in return. Most importantly, do not rush time away that is guaranteed to never return! 

Live in the moment! Live in the present! Live in the present moment! 

***Dont forget to comment your creative ideas for Friday's drawing! It's simple: come up with a short-story plot (it can be weird, funny, twisted, or complete nonsense) and post it in the comment section! Thank you!***

 

Submit Your Creations

I want to practice my creative writing! As a result: Comment a story plot or scenario below! It can be anything — crazy, twisted, even complete nonsense. In return, at the end of the week I will write each scenario (word-for-word) on a slice of paper (yes, I said slice. People say a piece of pizza when it's a slice. . . So who's to say it's not a slice of paper?) into a jar or hat (which ever is available at the time) and draw one out! I will announce the winner every Friday (this weeks drawing will take place on 11/7/14) and Saturday I will post the story. So, here's your chance! Comment your best, or worst, ideas below! Thank you! :)

Social Vortex

    

     Are you happy? No, are you truly happy? Can you tell someone one thing that made you fill up with excitement everyday. . . even when your day was the worst day on this planet? Can you find a speck of hope? 

     So many of us are captured by the attention of social media. It's obvious and there's no denying this fact. This isn't a new case in the making for breaking news. Its quite well-known. The cause of this is because our specific species (homosapians) is too afraid of one thing other species do not care about or even have knowledge of. Time! We are the only species to have fear of time running out. 

     Social media has only adapted our lives in a way that we no longer can have our moment. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, and so many other social apps have enable us to share every living second with the world. We no longer know the true value of time. Instead of appreciating it (time) we have the biggest fear of it. 

     Earth revolves around the Internet in today's society. That one moment that you could share only with that special someone is now streamed by millions over social media. Why can't that specific moment be your moment? Who said it was anyone else's to claim? Yet, we've evolved into this solution that it's hard not to post these cherished moments of ours. It's not for envy or jealousy. . . it's simply a custom we've created. 

     Last night I decided to go outside for awhile. I began listening to iTunes Radio and my phone died. Honestly I didn't even feel like charging my phone — it was all the way upstairs and it was just too much at the time. So as the minutes progressed, I happened to look up at the sky. I live in the country so not many lights are able to distort the stars from one's vision. They are in plain view, burning ever so brightly. This particular night was astonishing. The sky's hue faded from a light indigo to a dark violet; the stars being as incandescent as ever, forming constellations I know not. 

     I couldn't shake this scenery, so I layed down in the field of grass and just observed the sky. We all see it everyday. Whether it's raining or storming or even shining brightly to light the world around us, it's always constant. Really, it's the only constant thing in our lives. But in this very moment I establish a memory in my life. It was perfect! The first thing I reached for was my phone to snap a photo and post it to share with the world, but my phone was dead. It had totally escaped my thought because it is so common for us to use our devices that practically rule our lives. This moment, this memory was mine! 

     We've easily extinguished the priceless moments in our lives. That one moment to share for the rest of your life; that one moment that people wish they were there to witness; that one moment that makes everything around you feel perfectly timed and in order. Those are the moments we are suppose to strive for. Every moment of your life is not for the world. It's for you and those there with you. Those moments are yours! No one can steal those from you. . . unless you allow them to. 

     Then I spotted an airplane thousands and thousands of feet above me. I waved to the passengers although they would never know this. They would never know i exsisted; they wouldn't see my wave of greetings; they wouldn't even know there was a house that I would sleep in that night.  Flying directly above me at extreme speeds, onto the next adventure in their lives. Would they, too, be sucked into the vortex of social media? Or would they allow the precious moments of life simmer inside them and only them? 

     You must understand this: I'm not saying don't post things on social networks, but limit them. Let your distant family see how you're doing and update them, but don't allow yourself to forget to enjoy every moment, as much as possible! 

     Then, the thought of the plane crashing on top myself made me shutter. Would I be content with my life choices thus far. Granted, that would be an epic way to pass, but would I be okay with dying in that very instant? 

     Life is 90% about situations or problems that occur, while the other 10% is how you manage and deal with these occurrences. Your choices determine your character. Do what you love but know that you can only make your descisions. Don't let someone influence you because, ultimately, you are the yes or the no. 

     Remember to continue to carry yourself with self-love and self-respect. Don't degrade your lifestyle to common society customs. Allow yourself the pleasures of life itself — without time being the concerning factor. 

Perceptions of a Somebody

"You're fat. You're ugly. You're gay. You're worthless. All you ever do is mess things up." The list could go on and on with what people may have said to you. But from this moment forward let's take Lysol and some rags and wash the lies off!  

     People's perception is different from one individual to the next. That's why we are different. But one of the worst things you can do is get wrapped up in their lies. The point from when you began to believe their lies and judgement is when you loose all sense of self. 

     Society has a power to control other's lives. The major trends, the popular looks, the music that is taking over — it is all based on majority rule. What about that one speck of opinion lost in space? No one cares about it. But that's alright. One day someone will. It's better to have one person truly appreciate you than to go by society "rules" and views. 

     Everyday people are confronted by others. Whether it be in a positive or negative way, we are confronted. Posts of social networks, from the clothes we wear — we are always searching for comfort and acceptance. It never fails. 

     Let's change some things. How does that sound? Don't allow someone to tell you what's right or wrong. Do what pleases you. The only way someone can appreciate someone's time is to acknowledge and love their own company. You may feel lonely but you are finding who you really are. What are your loves, your pet-peeves and what really brings you happiness. Who said we needed someone to be happy. 

     Don't worry about what your peers or elders think. Ultimately, you know the real you. You are the only one who can decide upon decisions in your life. It's funny how we are literally brain-washed to talk a certain way, walk that way, dress this way, and understand what's acceptable in public. Who made these rules? They didn't just apperate from thin air! So who's to say they are right? They aren't right; that person just wasn't ashamed or afraid to say, "Hey, you're not allowed to go nude in public!" From that moment on he began to have people agree and appreciate his opinion.

     You're not fat: you simply like to eat. Or maybe that's not even the case! Many times its genetic; it just happens when you try your hardest to stay in control. Embrace it and just understand your body. Learn to love you. Respect that your body is that way. 

     You're not ugly: you just don't appeal to some people. . . Which is normal. Last time I checked not everyone likes someone. Learn to know what makes you beautiful and display that. Love yourself! 

     And for God's sake, NO ONE is worthless. Obviously we are here on Earth and we don't necessarily have to make our mark, but we can contribute to the world. The watch you just bought helped someone's life out because they are getting their needs meet. The peson who bought a burger from McDonalds is keeping someone's job open because of no one bought their burgers, then that company would shut down.

     So no you may not leave your mark on the world. And sometimes that better than leaving one. Some people are only remembered by a handful of individuals. But those specific people, more than likely, had their lives changed for the better. You may have inspired them. 

     Personally, as long as I inspire or save one person in my lifetime, I can honestly say I have lived! Perception is a tricky thing that we are forced to live with. Don't let someone change you or your view on things. You are you! You are important! Always carry yourself with self-love and self-respect! 

Importance of Family

Family is very important to me personally. They are the ones who have witnessed you at your worst and watched you blossom into the extraordinary human-being you are today. No two families are alike in any way. Yes, you and a friend may both have grandmothers that can cook amazingly well, but one grandmother may have a different view on life than the other. One father may have more experience in life with painting while the other dad has more experience with plumbing. 

My family in specific is very deranged and different. It's hard at times to deal with some of my family members. Some put on a front over social media and act completely different in person. 

With that being said, people don't really understand your personal struggle with family. The only way to deal with them is always try to be the bigger person. Learn what works for you. 

Speaking of my experience: my mother and I have never seen eye-to-eye. She states it's because we are just alike. I am her son, regardless, so I know I'll have some characteristics from her, but I do not and will never believe I'm exactly identical to her. 

Then there's that small fraction of your family who are "normal". I say normal with quotation marks around them because, as we know, no family is perfect or normal. But there are those families who manage with one another. You will always have issues with family. The way you deal with and face the issue(s) is the biggest picture. 

Some may find that speaking with a family member every five months is what works best for them. If that's so, continue to do so. If our have to talk to them every week, do that as well. 

Every family is dysfunctionally functional!

That's kind of the magical horror of it all. As a family we learn, naturally and with practice, how to manage amongst one another. You may never ever see eye-to-eye. And that's okay. As long as you respect that person and they do the same in return, that's what is important. 

Family is tricky and lovable but do not allow them to bring you down. Once they see you are doing the best you can and focusing on yourself to succeed, they will either embrace and respect that or stay to themselves. If that's the case, learn to manage with that. 

Of course, many are going to disagree with this, which is okay. You are entitled to ever opinion you hold within. But family is love; family is hardship; family is annoying and aggravating; family is family! 

True Love's Foolish Kiss

This past summer I was informed of a tragic event. It could have been more of a tragedy but, thankfully, it was not. I wrote this out of worry, love and hope. I call it True Love's Foolish Kiss. Enjoy!

True Love's Foolish Kiss:

  There once was a girl, the most beautiful girl on earth itself. Eyes blue as water yet transparent like glass, shimmering against the sunlight and allowing everyone to see through to her astonishing, gorgeous soul. Few only saw her from society's point of view and standards; most others saw her as unique, talented and the definition of true beauty. No one could compare. One day a boy, young and foolish, fell deeply in love with her. Young he was and foolish for not realizing the blessing before him. He stood in front of other girls and presented himself; the young and beautiful girl cast in shadows and left with shattered pieces of her broken heart. Never realizing the true affect this had on the young girl, the foolish boy continued his acts. Always asking for forgiveness and it was always given. For the beautiful girl had never loved before and never wanted to loose it; she forgave him with opened arms. 

Months passed and the boy moved far away, wishing to keep love tied down miles apart. The girl sent letters tied with her very own heart strings. Each day the boy received heart-wrapped letters of love and never bothered to respond. Eventually the foolish boy sent a letter in response to the girl's letters. Next morning's sunrise brought to the girl a little letter. As she examined the outside she saw it was not wrapped with his heart-strings, as all her previous letters had been. Confused and befuddled she slowly open the letter to reveal that it was written in a smeared, scarlet ink. Blood. His blood! 

"I love thee. I can't stand to feel the pain of not breathing the same air as thee. My apologies are sent with much love.", was all that was written. And with those simple words it was over. Twenty-five words and three sentences was all it took and it was instantly over. Days passed, then months. Before it was recognizable a year had passed that the two lovers where apart. 

The girl dreamed and longed for his return in hopes of recovering the love they once share so deeply and passionately. One summer's day, hot and humid, the young girl caught sight of the foolish boy in town. She called to him and soon they where arms length apart from one another. The two were lost for words. Even when the girl dreamed of this moment, she seemed to know exactly what she'd say, but now that it had become reality, she couldn't find the words to form. "I loved thee. I love thee.", that was the only thing she could find to present. The words shifted effortlessly from her plush lips. A tear stretched and scratched her cheek. Shocked with the sudden confession and guilt evolving inside, he ran. He ran until blisters formed on the soles of his feet. Confused with the feelings he was feeling, lost with what he should have said. It had been a year since he had seen his lover, let alone hear someone say such meaningful words. 

Losing hope, the girl wrote a letter and attached it to a dove that was once given to her by the foolish boy as a gift. She commanded that the dove find her lover and deliver her letter to him. As the dove was told, he found the boy and delivered the letter. It was different this time though. Very obvious to even the most least observant person. Where her heart-strings once were tied around was now replaced with something else. Red, warm, and having the effect to make him believe it was moving, perhaps beating. As he untied the letter he saw, to his amazement, it was half of the beautiful girl's heart, still beating inside his palm. Safely placing the broken heart on his table he began to read: 

"I love thee. Air, earth, body and heart we have once shared; a strong bond like no other. My apologies are sent with much love."

Twenty-five words and three sentences was all it took and it was instantly over. A letter arrived next day to the boy announcing the time and date of the farewell funeral of the beautiful girl. Tears tore down his face and he grabbed the broken heart, which had quit beating. Cold, still and blue. He packed for his leave and left with no question. Never looking back. Never second guessing.

At the funeral people wept and mourned loudly. When the boy arrived, the crowd that was gathered around the casket cleared, forming a space from him to the beautiful girl. The feeling he began to feel hurt deeply and horribly. Again tears streamed down his cheeks and he fell, unable to walk closer, not wanting to realize this was reality. His heart beating fast as he gasped for air. The tears becoming more rapid now. A few people from the crowd came forth and helped the poor foolish boy walk the rest of the way. 

As he slowly came to the side of the black, shiny, polished casket, he looked down at the gorgeous girl and saw, even though her eyelids where closed, the shimmer in her eyes that once allowed him to see through to her soul. Laying there, motionless, the girl still held a glow to herself that no one could ever receive. 

The boy reached into his pocket and pulled forth the broken heart that was sent to him. He then reached inside his chest cavity and ripped his heart out and tore it apart. The audience, shocked, gasped with terror and were horror-struck. He placed one part of his heart back inside his chest cavity and placed the piece the girl had sent to him on the other side, where it would fit with his like a puzzle piece. Now left holding a piece of his heart, he place it on the girl's chest cavity where it would correspond with her broken heart.

Still crying with pain and heart break, the boy leaned forward and kissed the girl's soft, velvet lips. They were no longer warm to the touch, but still plush and radiating love. "I loved thee. I love thee," where the only words he could find to speak, for he had never dreamed this would happen. As the foolish boy turned to exit, halfway through the crowd, he saw a bright purple light cast on the wall in front of him. He quickly turned but still unable to see what caused this burst of light. A crowd chatter began to rise in the quiet air. Gasps and cries of astonishment and glory bleed through the audience. Soon the beautiful girl stood and revealed herself to the boy. Standing in front of, what seconds ago was her casket, she smiled at the boy. Her pearly white teeth stretching across her perfect face. He looked down at her chest where her heart was and saw, to his surprise, a vivid purple light slowly dimming out of sight. 

Before he could ask questions she said: 

"Thou love is as deep as mine. Hidden for the longest time and now, finally revealed. My heart, cold, blue and lifeless, was blessed with a loving heart, warm and red, as yours. Strong enough to pump love through my once broken heart, allowing it to beat in sync with thous. Once your heart pumped inside your chest through my broken heart, it mended together, causing the two pieces of heart inside my chest to beat again. We are forever together. Heart, earth, air and body."

With this he smiled and cried tears of love, happiness, and joy and was finally complete. Worries vanished and hope rose within both of them. Her cold and blue heart was paired with his warm and red heart, causing their joined hearts to turn a bright and delicate violet. Able to feel one another's love forever, they lived happily for the rest of their days! 

The End

Eyes of an Outsider

     Today, while at Broadway on the Beach, my brother and his family and I stopped by Johnny Rocket's restaurant to get a bite to eat for lunch. Now, me being a vintage-junkie, I loved this place immediately! The old-fashion diner set up was spectacular! From the spinning bar chair to the servers hats, all the way down to the glassware and jukeboxes at the end of each table that ACTUALLY worked- it was amazing!

     Everyone broke out into song and dance at random moments and you were forced to wear a smile across your face. The energy was impressive and it made the experience that much more memorable. We were sitting, waiting for our order to arrive when a guy dressed in a Johnny Rocket mascot costume (a simple cup and straw with the logo across the front) passed our table, smiling, laughing, singing and dancing his way through the restaurant. 

     I had mentioned earlier during our visit that I would love to work there because I sing and dance all the time anyways. When the mascot passed, my brother looked at me and said, "I can totally see you taking that job." At first I was kind of offended and I asked why. My brother simply stated, "Because, his singing and dancing which you do constantly and never realize. Plus, he's always smiling and laughing as you do also." 

     That's when it really hit me. What do people really see? How do they perceive you trough their eyes - their minds? My brother and sister-in-law see me everyday (I live with them) and they say I'm a happy-go-lucky type of guy. Someone who is always smiling and laughing, singing and dancing, no matter who's around. That brightened my day to it's full extent! Personally, I have always felt I was a happy guy. Someone who went to school and (even though I may be going through things of my own) kept a smile on my face and encouraged others to do so as well. But, to have others tell you that they see you as what you envisioned yourself as has a feeling that can't be described! 

     So, I ask you. What do you think people would say about you if they were forced to expose the truth. Don't be afraid of it, embrace it. If you don't like what you would hear, change it and those qualities that you love, keep. 

     Always carry yourself with self love and respect. Be true to who you are. Change the world not one person at a time, but as many as you can inspire!